Kids Coaching: 5 phrases that will reduce your child’s self-esteem.

from On October 6, 2015

Kids Coaching: 5 phrases that will reduce your child’s self-esteem.

It would be nice if all parents and children were perfect. There would never be any frustration, anger, disputes…Unfortunately, parents and children are human beings and they are not perfect. Many parents made mistakes, said things  without thinking and ended up regretting it the next day. But the negative impact of certain words or phrases can be very important for the child’s self-esteem.

 Kids Coaching: Here are 5 phrases you should never say to your children:

-1 – “You’re an accident, we didn’t want another child” No child should ever have to hear this from his parents. Even if you are very frustrated with your child, you must never pronounce this terrible sentence. Not only this sentence will hurt the feelings of your child, but it will have a negative impact on his/her self-esteem and make him/her feel that he/she is not loved.

– 2 – “Hurry up or I’ll leave you here” Children dont understand the concept of time like adults. Many children live with  anxiety or fear of abandonment, if this is the case, never say that phrase to your child. You are just boosting his/her fears and anxiety without actually finding a solution to the current problem. Your child will develop an insecure attachment and live daily in fear of losing you.

– 3 – “You never do what I ask you to do.” when saying this sentence, the only thing that your child will understand is that he is not capable of doing something good! You will only reduce his/her self-esteem! Try using the phrase, “I want  you to do it this way. “Be specific in what you ask, your child will understand better and will be able to accomplish what you requested.

– 4 – “I’d love you to be like your brother / your sister” No one likes to be compared with someone else. Everyone wants to be appreciated for who he or she is. A child who hears this will develop a sense of inferiority, helplessness and feel rejected.

– 5 – The negative comments about the other parent. Children should never be mixed with disagreements or hear one parent speak badly about his other parent. All parents get frustrated at one time or another and can react very badly in some situations. If you say one of the above statements, an immediate apology is necessary to your child. Explain that you were wrong, you didn’t want to say what you said, tell them you love them and that you will try not to repeat these bad words again. Children need to have parents who encourage and help them build a good self-esteem.

We hope this Kids Coaching article was helpful to you. Please let us know if you have questions or comments, we love hearing from you. Best Regards!


Traduction: Serge N


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